With the emergence of the Omicron virus, I won’t kid you, the beginning of 2022 started to seem a little grim. I honestly wish I could quickly alter my mindset out of this, but I’m having a hard time doing so. People are still treating Covid-19 like a joke, and I haven’t laughed once. I know so many people who have caught Covid and they were the pinnacle of being careful. The beginning of my 20s have been plagued with this God forsaken virus; during times like these, it seems like survival mode is the only way to go. When you’re in survival mode, you have a tendency to neglect your needs. In 2021, I realized I am a workaholic, not necessarily because I like responding to emails, reminding people of tasks, and staying up until the wee hours of the night, but because I felt validated by doing so. I was afraid of feeling like I was less then, and that’s all survival mode is rooted in…fear. Survival mode caused me to always be paranoid and had me living on the edge instead of just living. I just wanted to feel safe for once, and I know that I can offer that to myself…it’s everyone else I’m side eyeing. I feel I am one of my greatest protectors, and I’m not saying that’s a bad thing. I’ve been setting better boundaries as of late, and that has certainly allowed me peace of mind and a certain type of protection. If I’m tired, I am now trying to take time out of my day to rest, whether it be with a self care activity or literally getting in my bed and resting. I can find ways to protect myself that don’t require me closing myself off emotionally. I would be lying if I said everything took a negative turn; I have many things to be thankful for; blessings that I wouldn’t have received if I had remained in my comfort zone. Fear blocks blessings, and I want all of the blessings this year…I deserve it…whoever else decides to read this, you deserve it too. I want to shift into a thrive mindset. The goals and aspirations that I scribble down in my journal are ones that I want to come into fruition this year, and I have a better chance of achieving them if I think with an abundance mindset. I believe Margaret Atwood has a quote that says:
“Last year, I abstained. This year, I devour, without guilt, which is also an art.”
Who told us it was a bad thing to want good things to happen to us? In my case, I am the one that is telling myself that. Despite the despair that I might feel due to certain incidents that are occurring in our world today, I can try to bring some love and light into my life. This year, I’m going to do the things that I have dreamt of doing, and pray that I see success in my endeavors. I’m learning that there are opportunities galore out there for everybody, including me, I just have to start allowing myself to be open to receiving them. This year, I want to uncover a new type of confidence. I want to be more solid with myself; I want to see myself as a friend and not as an enemy. I deserve the time to rest, because if I don’t rest, I won’t have the energy to continue striving toward my goals. I am going to be kind to myself this year…yes, I’m going to actually do it this year instead of just saying it. I’m going to actually do it…something that I’m going to implement in more ways than one. Speaking things into existence is one thing, but I also need to put forth action. Survival mode doesn’t allow manifestations to flourish, it keeps them dormant; only to exist as dreams and fantasies. The angel number 222 represents a state of balance and harmony, two things I would love to have right about now. I hope 2022 ushers in peace and serenity and calm minds that continue to be restless. I hope faith is our guide and leads us to a place where fear cannot set foot.
Happy New Year!